My first comic festival Part 2

...(continued from previous post)

*Okay.  Little recap.  So VanCAF is less than two weeks away.  I'm hoping that my comic will arrive in time, and I start to get everything else ready (business cards, illustrations to print, prices etc.)  I also get to work on some new illustrations that I can sell, especially because I'm really tired of my old stuff!!*

I should also mention, within this time, the comic proof arrived in the mail.  It is basically a real, saddle-stitched finished copy of my comic! And it was in my hand!  I had to go through it, make sure there was nothing I needed to change, sign a proof-approval form, and then they would print it for me.

I flipped through it.  I hoped so badly that I didn't see a really dumb spelling mistake.  Because I knew that if I did, I'd have to fix it.  And then I'd basically be out of luck.  I read through every page.  I felt kind of proud, but weirdly underwhelmed.  

Maybe seeing it in my hand for the first time was odd.   The pages and panels were so... small.   Maybe it was from staring at the original art for so long, and then seeing it reduced to a smaller size.  I don't know.  I couldn't quite figure it out.  Maybe I didn't want to get too excited, because if I was feeling really good about it, then I'd be even more disappointed if it wasn't ready on time.  

Other than the unexplainable emotion I felt about seeing my comic printed for the first time, I was really happy with the actual work the printers had done.  Colour, size, paper quality.  It was all great.  And their customer service was wonderful.  Leaving me with no other concern.  

Thankfully, no spelling mistakes!  I signed the proof approval form.

Finally, the last week rolled around.  

And then suddenly it was the day before the festival.  

I went out to pick up my business cards and a few other last minute things.

When I got home, there was a box waiting for me.  

I won't deny it felt great.  To see them all there.  The feeling that I actually FINISHED something.  Me.  After so many years of wanting to be this and that.  Starting stuff and never finishing.  28 pages of a story.  A first issue.  Beginning, middle, and end.  And it only took me about eight years to figure it out.

Not to be too hard on myself, I guess.  The road to figuring out what you really, really love is an unpredictable one.  But the satisfaction in myself was kind of short-lived.  I began thinking about all the things I wished I had done differently.

In my head, I was already working on issue #2 and thinking about how much better it would be....